75 Days Ago

As many of you know, I just quit smoking. I am now on my own free of all nicotine and all the other poisons in cigarettes. But I did use NicoDerm as an aid to help me quit. Also the website Quitnet was a huge help. Used this product for 10 weeks in 3 different steps. This is a patch that you wear one a day for 10 weeks that supplys nicotine only into your blood system. Each step in the NicoDerm gives you less nicotine into your body. No smoking at all with the patches. I will admit I had very few cravings for a cigarette. But did have many wants for one which taught me a lot into smoking is much a habit.

Now, I will says this for the NicoDerm patches. It worked great to help me stop smoking. Can't say it will for you because everyone is different, but it did for me. And I think when I say it worked for me, it's saying a lot for the product because when I put down cigarettes 75 days ago, I 100% in my heart did not want to quit. I still would love to be smoking. I enjoyed it but I have to say that I've went this far, I won't go back.
But I do have to confess, that somewhere about three weeks into quitting, I did give into the cravings. I smoked one and it did nothing for me. Couple hours later I smoked another and still nothing. So I gave it up and stuck to the quitting program.

Ok, as I said, it's working for me. But here's the kick back and if I knew what I know now, I never would have quit. And I hope what I'm about to say does not stop anyone who is thinking of using NicoDerm to quit smoking because it's not only NicoDerm that is the problem. In fact one may could look at it as NicoDerm isn't in fault at all. And also if you remember I said that everyone is different.
One body goes through many changes as you quit smoking. I'm felt tightness in my chest and in my lungs so much that I hurt. I've had days that I felt good one day and bad the next. Had days that I woke up feeling bad but as day went on, I felt better, and also the opposite some days. There has been more bad days than good. I'm off the patches now but still some days are pretty bad. In the first 6 weeks I started coughing up the black tar from my lungs from cigarettes. To tell the truth, I've felt a lot like I was/am on a drug for the last 75 days. Sometimes I truly don't know what I am doing. Have to stop and think about what I'm doing. Can't keep a thought in my head for very long without getting side tracked. Get confused a lot, can't focus very long on anything. And get bored with anything and everything within a couple of minutes. People and everything gets on my nerves. What's really bad is when you get on your own nerves. I get mad easy and most times when I do, I don't know why.
The worst hell I think there is when people can't understand what's happening to someone that is quitting. They don't know what it's like and don't understand and they act like your being silly over the whole thing. And your having a craving, and someone that does not or never have smoked says, "no you don't really need to smoke. It's all in your thinking you do". They just don't know how tight my hands could get around their throat. LOL!
Yeah, I can still laugh on it, but come on people. Have and give at least little respect for someone you know or who is dealing with quitting something, be it cigarettes, drugs, drinking, or whatever.

But what I am going through is a small price that some have paid because of cigarettes. I think of Debra of MamaFlo's Place blog at least once a day about what's she's going through now. Stop by there when you can and say hi, She's a cool lady for sure!

Anyway, this is why my blog posting has fell off so much and didn't mean to go on so long with this. Just hope you can make heads or tails out of what I said. lol

16 Days And Still Kicking...

Ohhh yeah, and Wanda is still living and staying safe. lol
I quit 16 days ago today after smoking for about 37 years. Some of you have asked how I'm doing on quitting smoking and sorry that I haven't got back to answering it. I get caught up in other things and time seems to slip by. So getting it done now. Only one problem to quitting smoking for me, I didn’t want to quit and part of me still don’t want to quit, but, I will not pay the prices of cigarettes today.

I’ve never the whole time I've smoked ever tried to quit and pretty much know by not wanting to quit, there is no way I can do it cold turkey so I’m using the Nicoderm patches. And reading a website called QUITNET. A great site with a lot of help. The website is a program through my insurance company to help people quit smoking along with other addictions that some people have. Plus I have someone that calls me from time to time to see how I'm doing or answer any questions that may come up, and I'm also able to call the person if I hit a hard place and need help getting through it. But so far all is good. Maybe to good! Not one craving for a smoke in 16 days but I have had a few times that I just wanted one. Specially after a meal. Which tells me it was/is only a habit each time. And when I do want one, I grab a lifesaver candy.

Sure, there's been some up and down times where I just feel like crap. I'm sure there's more times to come.  Times when I don't want anyone near me or mess with me, but they don't last to very long. I've starting yesterday and so far today feeling ok as I did before I quit. Hoping I stay like this the rest of the way. The want for a smoke seems to be getting less now. That is until I get worked up or feel pushed about something.
So all is going real good and like I said, maybe going to good. Can't help but wonder what and when is something going to break loose from hell and hit me hard because it's going all to smooth.

Anyway, taking it day by day, sometimes minute by minute and waiting until I am totally smoke free. :-)