6/28/09

75 Days Ago

As many of you know, I just quit smoking. I am now on my own free of all nicotine and all the other poisons in cigarettes. But I did use NicoDerm as an aid to help me quit. Also the website Quitnet was a huge help. Used this product for 10 weeks in 3 different steps. This is a patch that you wear one a day for 10 weeks that supplys nicotine only into your blood system. Each step in the NicoDerm gives you less nicotine into your body. No smoking at all with the patches. I will admit I had very few cravings for a cigarette. But did have many wants for one which taught me a lot into smoking is much a habit.

Now, I will says this for the NicoDerm patches. It worked great to help me stop smoking. Can't say it will for you because everyone is different, but it did for me. And I think when I say it worked for me, it's saying a lot for the product because when I put down cigarettes 75 days ago, I 100% in my heart did not want to quit. I still would love to be smoking. I enjoyed it but I have to say that I've went this far, I won't go back.
But I do have to confess, that somewhere about three weeks into quitting, I did give into the cravings. I smoked one and it did nothing for me. Couple hours later I smoked another and still nothing. So I gave it up and stuck to the quitting program.

Ok, as I said, it's working for me. But here's the kick back and if I knew what I know now, I never would have quit. And I hope what I'm about to say does not stop anyone who is thinking of using NicoDerm to quit smoking because it's not only NicoDerm that is the problem. In fact one may could look at it as NicoDerm isn't in fault at all. And also if you remember I said that everyone is different.
One body goes through many changes as you quit smoking. I'm felt tightness in my chest and in my lungs so much that I hurt. I've had days that I felt good one day and bad the next. Had days that I woke up feeling bad but as day went on, I felt better, and also the opposite some days. There has been more bad days than good. I'm off the patches now but still some days are pretty bad. In the first 6 weeks I started coughing up the black tar from my lungs from cigarettes. To tell the truth, I've felt a lot like I was/am on a drug for the last 75 days. Sometimes I truly don't know what I am doing. Have to stop and think about what I'm doing. Can't keep a thought in my head for very long without getting side tracked. Get confused a lot, can't focus very long on anything. And get bored with anything and everything within a couple of minutes. People and everything gets on my nerves. What's really bad is when you get on your own nerves. I get mad easy and most times when I do, I don't know why.
The worst hell I think there is when people can't understand what's happening to someone that is quitting. They don't know what it's like and don't understand and they act like your being silly over the whole thing. And your having a craving, and someone that does not or never have smoked says, "no you don't really need to smoke. It's all in your thinking you do". They just don't know how tight my hands could get around their throat. LOL!
Yeah, I can still laugh on it, but come on people. Have and give at least little respect for someone you know or who is dealing with quitting something, be it cigarettes, drugs, drinking, or whatever.

But what I am going through is a small price that some have paid because of cigarettes. I think of Debra of MamaFlo's Place blog at least once a day about what's she's going through now. Stop by there when you can and say hi, She's a cool lady for sure!

Anyway, this is why my blog posting has fell off so much and didn't mean to go on so long with this. Just hope you can make heads or tails out of what I said. lol

7 comments:

  • Testuser said....

    Chilly -- I have never smoked, so can't relate personally to what you are going through, but my husband gave up smoking about 20 years ago now and he did go through a lot of what you did -- used the patches too.

    He now can't stand the smell of cigarettes and doesn't miss them at all. He's so much healthier since he quit, too. Before he quit, he had bouts of bronchitis quite frequently -- since he quit, I think he's had two. He feels better and has more energy. I'm praying you get to that place very soon!

  • Margie and Edna said....

    I feel your pain. I quit 3 months ago, cold turkey, and I experienced exactly what you're discussing. I didn't use patches because I know it takes the nicotine 3 days to get out of your body. I'd rather suffer that 3 days than prolong it.
    I think many people can't grasp that nicotine is a drug and is addictive. How many times did people just tell me to stop? No addict just stops. It's painful.

  • KAT said....

    Congrats Chilly!! You are doing great.
    And I understand the symptoms you speak about, I have tried to quit before, and will keep trying until I am successful too!!

    Wish me luck!!
    Kat

  • Mr. New Dilemma said....

    I smoke! MMMM, good. It will kill me one day. Maybe you should tell a doctor this and have him check you over just to make sure you didn't accidently cough up a lung long ago.

  • Rebecca Mecomber said....

    WOW. What an awful experience! It is so great that you are quitting. Hang in there!

  • MamaFlo said....

    Chilly, you described your battle quite well and I know it's a battle, even now. I used Chantix to quit so going cold turkey on the nicotine was best for me and it appears my family survived :). You've done it, you quit smoking and that's what counts - did you replace your smoking time with anything else? Did you find you really did spend a great deal of time smoking (I did).
    I'm really proud of you Chilly!
    I loved smoking too but like you, I found that I don't think it was the nicotine as much as it was the act of smoking. Would I go back - NO WAY, especially now that I have this damn oxygen tank with me all the time (and I'm not quite 54 yet) - damn-damn-damn!! Everyone isn't going to be like me but most of you will be at some point and the sooner you quit the better off you're going to be and if you haven't started, don't!!!!!

    What will hold me true is making friends like Chilly and others I've met online. I'm here for you friend (your friendship means more than I can express).

  • stumpsounder said....

    Wow. It's hell I know. Keep the path.

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